And Then I Got Cancer

I know I'm recovering because my cell counts are going up. But I can tell I'm recovering because I'm getting restless. Being in the hospital got really old all of a sudden. And being at the University hospital got old even faster than being at the VA. Everyone here seems to think the VA is more regimented, or more military-esque? But when I was there I could take long walks outside around the park, or go over to Rose to get a chai. I had so much stuff in my room, I would spend close to an hour every morning just rearranging it all. I was running out of room on the walls to hang cards and decorations. At the new place, it took a while before they were willing to disconnect me from my IV pole. I have to put on a gown before I leave my room for a walk (which makes sense, what with the c. diff). I can't bring all that stuff into my new room because it's probably contaminated now (with c. diff spores). There's a very small area where I can walk outside. Overall, t

The good news is I don't have to worry about having a stem cell donor for a while. The bad news is I don't have to worry about having a stem cell donor because I'm not in remission. Dr. Bowles broke the news yesterday that I am still at 10 percent leukemia cells. So the second round of chemo, the FLAG-IDA protocol, did nothing for me. In the next breath he told me that I would be transferred to the University of Colorado hospital so I can participate in a clinical trial. The goal is still remission, followed by a stem cell transplant. I was surprised. I was really sure, because the first round had worked so well, the second would surely knock out the last of the bad guys. But I was also sure one of my brothers would be a match for me. And I was also sure that I didn't have leukemia to begin with. Over the next few hours, my parents came down to the hospital and packed up my entire room, which was no small task. All my clothes, bedding, electronics, coloring books,

I got some discouraging news Friday. The HLA (human leukocyte antigen) testing showed that neither of my brothers is a match for me for stem cell donation. If you want to read more about HLA matching, you can look on the Be The Match website. This is the worst news since my chromosomal testing put me in the highest risk group of AML, the group with the lowest rates of survival. I need a stem cell transplant to have a fighting chance, and these transplants are more successful when the donor is related. But whatever. Now I know my brothers won't work as donors, I'm like a free agent. I get to go shopping around in some database for a donor who best suits my immunological needs. Well, my doctors get to do that. I hope there's someone out there for me. Or maybe some donated cord blood for me. I'm told the likelihood of finding a match depends a lot on ethnicity. Apparently white people like me have the easiest time finding a donor because there are so many white regis

When I enlisted in the Navy, one of the things that surprised me was the slightly different usage of certain words. For instance, "hygiene" is used as a verb. When I started chemo, I started hearing "fever" used as a verb all the time. The doctors told me "Everyone fevers when they're neutropenic." It still sounds weird to me. Maybe if I start putting it in writing I'll get used to it enough to be able to use it in conversation. So, last Thursday as I was getting ready for my bone marrow biopsy, I was starting to fever . It happens all the time so I didn't think much of it at first. But the day wore on and my temperature kept climbing. Sometime in the evening the doctors decided I had been fevering long enough and decided to run the standard tests: blood cultures, urine sample, chest X-ray. Before the tests came back they started me on another broad spectrum antibiotic. But even on that, I continued to fever . My temperature eventually cli